By Lindy Letterall
Getting the right work-life balance in your relationship
It's the ultimate irony of the modern age there are more and more gadgets and devices to make our lives easier, yet we never seem to have any free time. Finding enough time to spend with each other is a common cause of tension in relationships. Here's how to juggle all the demands in your life and get the right balance of quality time with your partner.
We all face more and more demands and pressures in life as we get older, from performing well at work and managing a home and personal finances to maintaining a relationship and bringing up children. Gone are the carefree days of our youth when we had entire days to while away at our leisure. It's no wonder we feel as if we just don't have any time to ourselves.
You can't escape your pressures and responsibilities, but there's a lot you can do to manage your time effectively in order to get everything in balance and fit in everything you need and want to do.
The most important first step is to accept your life and your responsibilities. If you've got a young family, they're bound to take up most of your time and there's nothing you can do about that. The same will apply if you're busy at work or have a relative to care for. Make the most of it while it lasts your kids won't be young forever and having lots of challenges at work can be positive and fulfilling and look to the future. Things won't always be like this.
Sit down and make a list of all the things that take up time in your life. Break it down to a weekly basis as a useful unit of measurement and estimate how much time you spend on each thing. Now analyse your typical week. Discount everything that's absolutely essential such as work or necessary household or family commitments as you can't ditch these, and look at everything else. You may find that you're actually wasting your time doing a lot of things that are of no interest, necessity or benefit to you. Or you may find that you're spending too much time on things that needn't be so time-consuming. Work out a new timetable for yourself.
If you have hobbies or regular activities that you take part in which you just can't find the time for, or which are stopping you from spending quality time with your partner, rethink when you do them. For example, scale down your art classes to once a fortnight rather than once a week, or go to the football less often (or watch it on television instead) even if it's just on a temporary basis until you have more time in your life. This way you don't need to give up your interests completely and can still enjoy them now and again.
Remember, you don't have to do everything yourself. Consider what you can do to make your life easier. For example, employ a cleaner or gardener or get your ironing done by an ironing service if you can afford it, buy kitchen equipment to make the cooking and cleaning easier, such as a food processor, microwave or dishwasher. Do your shopping online the weekly supermarket shop can be time-consuming, and even just nipping out to buy a present can take time. Even wash your car at the car wash rather than mess around with a bucket and hose at home! Also, accept offers from friends and family or even ask them politely for help. In most cases they will be willing to oblige. Perhaps your mother could pick the kids up from school, or your neighbour could pick something up from the shops for you while they're out. You can always return the favour.
Spending time with your partner is about quality, not quantity. Make sure that the little time you do have to yourselves is fun. Sit and watch television together rather than pottering about doing your own thing. Go to bed a little earlier even if it's just to relax and chat. Even share household chores with each other. Sometimes it can be fun if you're doing it as a team, especially the cooking.
Finally, who cares if the housework isn't up-to-date or you just cooked a quick and basic meal? The world's not going to end, is it? Put things in perspective and remember what's really important.
About the Author: Author: Lindy Letterall - Website: www.yourlovelife.co.uk
Lindy Letterall is anagony aunt. She's currently writing articles for Your Love Life.
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