By Jill Butler
Falling in love is about committing... to someone or something. In this case, it's about being engaged with our homes, getting to know them, and getting to know ourselves through them. It's a relationship like with a partner, man or woman. We get to know ourselves through the getting to know them.
Our homes are a mirror of how we feel about ourselves. Have we invested in this relationship? Do we give thought to our physical environment? The surprising and wonderful thing about when we do invest, our homes give back. They comfort. They wrap their arms around us. Having devoted time and care to this home, we feel good about ourselves. And in turn, we feel nurtured, safe and nested. Our homes are not inanimate. They are alive, as alive as we are.
The more we invest the more we know each other. The more we give. the more receive from our relationship with our home. The maintaining, unlike the first flushes of falling in love, isn't always easy or fun. The falling in love is the hook, the initial impulse, the day to day is the emotional investment.
I write in my new book, Create The Space You Deserve, about love at first sight and my then ugly duckling cottage. Along the way of renovating, I had to check in, ask myself, was I still in love, even with all it's problems? It's like with a new guy. Fall in love is the easy piece. And soon the work begins. The investment. We start to see if this a short term or a long term investment. As things begin to slide, or not be so much fun, we need to remember what brought us here and ultimately reinvest our energy and commitment.
Simple changes. What are some simple changes I can make to come into harmony with me and my home? When I look around what calls out? Flowers. A new pillow for the porch. A new set of sheets springs to mind.
A major me, me, me is shouting at me!!!!!
My garden has been neglected most of the summer for all the reasons. It was so easy when everything was newly planted and landscaped. Late yesterday afternoon, I was feeling a bit blue, so I went outside and got in engaged, reconnected with my yard. I started by weeding, doing the basics. I like weeding. As I got deeper into to it, I ripped out a rose bed area that was pathetic. Went at it! I pulled out the entire planted area that begged to be refreshed. What it wants to be next, I don't know yet. Ideas start to come, the clearing of the old begins to make way for the new. The new will show it's self. I trust this process. I didn't need to know before I started. I just needed to get started.
The emotional and physical investment in our homes creates what they call in the investment world the ROI, return on investment, in feelings of well-being! When we feel well within we are able to go out into the world at large relaxed, balanced while remembering to acknowledge ourselves and our home for this unique relationship.
Jill Butler is an author, illustrator, designer and creativity coach. Her product designs are specific to France as are her first three books. Jill now writes for women in transition and how the home and the personal transformation work hand in hand in her latest book, Create the Space You Deserve. For more, visit: Jill Butler.
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