by: Mike Hamilton

Finding a unique birthday gift can be one of the most challenging, frustrating and rewarding things you will ever do. When your loved one's eyes light up with that expression that tells you "I never even knew I wanted this but now I wouldn't trade it for all the money in the world."

If you haven't had that experience then it is hard to put into words how wonderful it makes you feel. If you approach it as a chore or something you need to do then you will never find the perfect and unique birthday gift.

One mistake that a lot of people make is trying to find a unique gift and then deciding if it is something the person will like. This sometimes ends up being akin to trying to fit a round peg in a square hole.

Think about what you are celebrating then find something that honors that celebration. If you are celebrating the friendship you share with that person then shop with that in mind. Think about the things you have shared with each other.

If you have been on fishing trips together then contemplate those trips and what made them enjoyable. If it is simply the quite times sharing ideas and thoughts over coffee then let those memories come flooding back.

The best gifts are the most personal. What makes the gift unique is the uniqueness of the person you are shopping for and not the gift itself.

If this method of choosing a gift seems like it takes more effort then it seems it is worth then maybe the problem is that you need to examine why you are concerned that you find a perfect and unique birthday present.

If the motive is that you really want them to open it and just share the joy they are going to feel then it should be a pretty easy exercise. If the motive is what you can get out of it besides joy then it is a chore that is could very well be among the toughest you have ever tackled.

Ralph Parlette, the author of "The University of Hard Knocks", is quoted as saying, "Real birthdays are not annual affairs. Real birthdays are the days when we have a new birth."

The wise words of Parlette say what I am saying much more eloquently than I can. If you choose to celebrate the birth of your relationship in addition to the annual affair you will find that you have taken the first and most important step in finding a the perfect and unique birthday gift.

Make the day, a day that you share in and are a part of and you will find that the search will be much easier. Become a participant, not a spectator and your search is just about over and a fruitful search it will be.

At our website we offer a mini-website for honoring birthdays where you can post pictures, poems, or memories. After all memories are what they are celebrating, shouldn't that be your celebration as well.