By Hal Stevens
Your thoughts are cloudy. You're weary—both physically and emotionally. The last thing you want to think about is the duty of writing something. And, while your every thought is of the individual who has died, the person that you miss so awfully, you're at a loss as to what to say about them. There's so much to say. How can you sum up an entire life in just a few minutes?
The reality of the situation, however, is that you've been asked to deliver the eulogy. Perhaps you're a close friend of the deceased. Perhaps you're their spouse, their child, their brother or sister. Regardless of your relationship, it's a frightening prospect.
Remember as you're beginning to write your eulogy that this isn't a school assignment. So, there's no need to flashback to sweaty-palmed book reports and essays about state flowers that you had to deliver to a classroom full of disinterested students. This is a heartfelt message given to a group of people who have gathered for a common purpose. You're not going to be graded or judged on your performance. There won't be reviewers with pens and pads seated in the front row.
Furthermore, your eulogy doesn't have to be a formal speech. A eulogy can be a tribute of any kind. Some of the styles are:
1. A speech.
Whether long and formal or shirt and casual, this is the most traditional type of tribute.
2. A story from the life of the deceased.
Often, a true story is the most personal way of memorializing someone. It serves to remind the mourners who the deceased really was.
3. A letter written to the deceased.
Intimate and personal, a letter helps you and the other mourners honor the life of your loved one and make peace with their passing.
4. A poem.
Poetry is often one of the most emotionally effective ways of communicating.
5. A brief listing of the deceased's achievements.
Succinct and formal, such a listing is the perfect way to summarize the life of someone who was goal-oriented and driven.
6. A slide show or video show of the deceased with family.
Sometimes words aren't even necessary. Very often, all we need to honor someone's memory is to see photos, or watch a video, and reminisce about good times, well spent.
7. A list of funny or important things that your loved one had said in his or her life—memorable quotations.
This is a tried-and-true method of speaking simply and effectively.
8. A favorite childhood story that fits the occasion.
For most people, childhood memories are bitter-sweet. A moving or even funny story from childhood gives your honor to a sense of history and warmth.
Hal is the author of several critically acclaimed eBooks specifically written to help people deal with end of life issues. His eBooks include topics such as: cremation, writing and delivering a eulogy, eco-friendly green funerals, funeral planning, organ donation, and buying and selling cemetery plots. To find out more about his CemeterySpot family of free services and resources, to learn more about his books, and to get a free gift, please visit: http://www.cemeteryspot.com.
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